All very good posts. We are a small firm with professional employees. Being service oriented, everyone understands normal daytime candor. For years, our holidya party was held in private rooms at restaurants. Last year, the group, with their spouses, was too big for normal seating and I commented to my wife that we should do something more like a cocktail party setting; with high rise tables, heavy hors d'oeveurs (however the f*ck you spell that) and light drinks. This would give us the ability to work the setting and talk to everyone.
I totally agree with post #7. I wasn't uncomfortable with my team being in the house as they are compensated well. Most have tried to be in a position like me and realize it is very difficult and are happy with their positions. But that is not to say, they would not develop annimosity after seeing our place.
With that said, we will likely shift gears next year and do a cocktail setting in a retaurant's private room, instead of a sit down meal. I never thought of the 'cab' letter prior to the event.
Would life be nice if it could be like Old School or Animal House and the 'politically correct' guidelines didn't exist.
Thank you all for sharing your thoughts and experiences. I am well-equipped to discuss with the wifey.